Today I have felt disappointment, hurt, and sadness.
I am not one to rant on social media. If I did that, then this morning my page would have been screaming the statement, "don't judge my child until you walk in his shoes". But the people who likely need to hear this message probably wouldn't have heard anyway... and if they did, it likely would not have made a scrap of difference.
My son lives a life that is different to many, but his life is also similar to some others... and this is why I am writing this post - for him, and for the others who likely experience the same hurt and sadness.
I wonder do people consider the effect of statements such as "don't play with (...) , he's a naughty kid, stay away from him".
In fact - even making off handed statements in front of their children about my child such as "yeah, he's a bit naughty" does nothing to help my son, and does nothing to ease the burden of his learning to live in this world.
I wonder do people ever realise the effort that it takes my child to try and make his way in a world that is not set up for him - in a world where it takes him so much longer and so much more effort than any other child to manage social situations that are established by people who naturally understand social niceties and social rules?
And I wonder do people ever stop and think just how far my child has come in his ability to manage these situations... or are they still too busy telling their children to steer clear of him because he's not the kind of child that they want around theirs.
My child is not perfectly behaved. I have no illusions about this. But neither is any other child perfectly behaved.
My child does not 'provoke trouble' any more than any other child but neither does he lie or tell untruths... and I wonder if sometimes this adds to his predicament when he shares the world with other children and teens who are able to bend the truth, and cover themselves where they need to.
My child is emotional, and he wears his heart on his sleeve... but it's a good heart - a loving heart that deserves fair treatment and a fair go.
So please..... watch what you say in the company of your children about other children who struggle with the social world. And before you make judgement and direct your child away from mine or others like mine, please put yourself in his shoes... in our shoes... in their shoes... and rethink...
I am not one to rant on social media. If I did that, then this morning my page would have been screaming the statement, "don't judge my child until you walk in his shoes". But the people who likely need to hear this message probably wouldn't have heard anyway... and if they did, it likely would not have made a scrap of difference.
My son lives a life that is different to many, but his life is also similar to some others... and this is why I am writing this post - for him, and for the others who likely experience the same hurt and sadness.
I wonder do people consider the effect of statements such as "don't play with (...) , he's a naughty kid, stay away from him".
In fact - even making off handed statements in front of their children about my child such as "yeah, he's a bit naughty" does nothing to help my son, and does nothing to ease the burden of his learning to live in this world.
I wonder do people ever realise the effort that it takes my child to try and make his way in a world that is not set up for him - in a world where it takes him so much longer and so much more effort than any other child to manage social situations that are established by people who naturally understand social niceties and social rules?
And I wonder do people ever stop and think just how far my child has come in his ability to manage these situations... or are they still too busy telling their children to steer clear of him because he's not the kind of child that they want around theirs.
My child is not perfectly behaved. I have no illusions about this. But neither is any other child perfectly behaved.
My child does not 'provoke trouble' any more than any other child but neither does he lie or tell untruths... and I wonder if sometimes this adds to his predicament when he shares the world with other children and teens who are able to bend the truth, and cover themselves where they need to.
My child is emotional, and he wears his heart on his sleeve... but it's a good heart - a loving heart that deserves fair treatment and a fair go.
So please..... watch what you say in the company of your children about other children who struggle with the social world. And before you make judgement and direct your child away from mine or others like mine, please put yourself in his shoes... in our shoes... in their shoes... and rethink...
